His Hidden Pain
by XAShotInTheDarkX
Summary: "Logan Mitchell tired to hid the bruises and cuts the best he could. Of course, that was easier said than done." A sad Logan story. Friendship in later chapters.
1. Chapter 1

**So this is my first story ever! I'm really excited and hope you like it! (I know it's not that great, so please go easy on me.) **

**Disclaimer: I own nothing**

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><p>Logan Mitchell tired to hid the bruises and cuts the best he could. Of course, that was easier said than done. The raven haired boy had a bruise just under his right eye and a busted lip. Logan also found another bruise on his left shin.<p>

The fourteen year old was used to getting the crap beaten out of him. Sadly, it wasn't anything new.

The bruise just under his eye was going to be hard to hide. Logan would just make up a lie and would hope no one, especially his three best friends would question him. He'd just say he fell or ran into something, but deep down Logan knew his friends wouldn't belive him. They were starting to notice more and more of Logan coming to school with unexplainable injuries, and it was only getting worse.  
>It started with Carlos noticing a not so small cut on Logan's palm. All day the raven haired boy tried to keep his hands hidden in his jacket pockets. Hoping to avoid anyone seeing the, then healing, large cut that ran across his pale palm. During class though, Logan had to handed a piece of paper to Carlos and that's when he saw it. When the short Latino asked him about the strange cut Logan quickly said he'd been washing dishes when he accidentally grabbed a knife by the blade, and cut himself. The lie might have worked, if only Logan wasn't such a bad lier. Carlos didn't seem to belive Logan, but dropped the subject for the time being.<p>

When James saw a bruise on Logan's wrist and questioned him, Logan was forced to lie to one of his best friends again. In attempt to cover the bruise, Logan once again wore a jacket. When it was time for hockey practice through, and Logan had to take off the jacket, James saw the unusual bruise. Logan found it was harder to lie about a bruise wrist than a cut on his palm. Logan told his worried friend it was nothing and tried to laugh it off and change the subject.

Logan felt somewhat lucky. Kendall had yet to see a cut or bruise on the small boy. Of his three best friends, Logan knew Kendall was most likely to force the truth out of him. Kendall wouldn't buy his lame excuses. Logan also felt lucky in the fact that neither Carlos or James had said anything to Kendall. Well he guessed that they hadn't said anything. If they had, Logan knew Kendall would confront him.

As Logan paced back and forth across his room, he felt like he was going to be sick. There was no way to hid the busted lip or the dark bruise that lay just under his brown eye. His friends would notice and definitely say something.

This was probably one the worst time Logan had even been beaten up. It had never gotten this bad before. Usually it only happened when his dad was drunk. His dad started drinking just after Logan's mom died. She unfortunately died when Logan was almost ten. It scared the now fourteen year old that his dad was completely sober this time.

When Logan first started getting beaten he'd just get slapped around, but nothing that actually left a mark. As Logan grew older the slaps got harder and he'd get punched from time to time. Now he was getting dark bruises near his eyes and busted lips.

That night Logan barley slept. All night he tossed and turned while trying to come up excuses, to come up with lies, to tell his friends. Logan came up with nothing.

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><p><strong>AN: I kn****ow this was really short. Sorry! Next chapter might be longer **


	2. Chapter 2

**Yay! Chapter two! Thank you _SO_ to the people who reviewed! It really gave me a confidence boost (I have zero confidence when it comes to my writing...) I'm sorry if it took me forever to upload this...My computer is broken and now I have to get a new one...Anyway, I really hope you like this chapter! Disclaimer: I own nothing! **

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><p>The next morning, Logan felt like crap. Not only from lack of sleep, but his head was pounding. It felt like someone had taken a sledgehammer to his head.<p>

'_Nothing aspirin can't fix,_' Logan decided as he walked from his room to the bathroom.

A part of Logan wanted to laugh as he saw his reflection. He looked horrible. Logan's bruise under his eye looked darker, if that was even possible, his lip didn't look any better either, and his shin hurt a little to walk on. The one "upside" was no one could see the bruise on his leg; his pants covered the purple bruise.

Logan finished getting ready and as quickly and quietly as he could leave for school. He skipped breakfast and left without a word. The raven haired boy didn't want to face his dad, who was probably still at home getting ready for work.

The walk to school was a slow. Logan felt sick and nervous. His stomach felt like it was twisted into knots. Logan was not looking forward to seeing his friends. He didn't want them to make a big deal about his injuries, which Logan knew they would. For a split second, Logan considered not going to school at all. It would be easier to just skip the whole day, but Logan knew it wouldn't end well. Kendall, James, and Carlos would just end up going to see him at his house. It was something the four best friends did for one another. Every time a member of their foursome was sick, or something, they made it their mission to see each other. No matter what.

When the fourteen year old did finally make it to school, he kept his head down and avoided eye contact with everyone. Logan walked to his locker to grab a few things he'd need for his morning classes, when...

"Hey Logan."

The timid boy dropped his textbook and nearly jumped, startled by the voice. This was it. Without having to look back, Logan knew which of his friends was behind him.

"Hey Carlos." Logan said his voice slow and controlled, not turning around to meet his friend. He pretended to be intensely interested in his locker.

"Oh hey, you dropped this." Carlos said.

Logan knew Carlos had picked up his fallen book from the ground. The fourteen year old knew he couldn't keep his back turned on his friend for much longer. Sooner or later he'd have to face Carlos, and ultimately James and Kendall. Logan just wished it be later rather than sooner. With a slow and shaky breath, Logan turned around to face Carlos.

The raven haired boy saw a mix of emotions cross his friends face in a matter of seconds. Carlos' eyes widened at first, he looked confused, worried, and then lastly angry.

"What happened, Logan?" Carlos said slowly and calmly. The fact that his voice was calm was scary to Logan. Carlos Garcia wasn't exactly known for being calm. Logan also noted that his Latino friend sounded very restrained. Carlos was also fixated on the bruise, Logan saw.

"I-" Logan began to speak, trying to come up with a fast lie, but was cut off.

"Hey guys does my hair look a little flat?" It was James. He held his lucky comb in one hand and a mirror in the other. James stopped in right in front of Logan's locker. Not seeing Logan at, or anyone else for that matter, James just kept talking. Neither Carlos nor Logan interrupted the sometimes self centered boy. Carlos stared at Logan's bruise, while Logan tried to come up with a believable lie. When James did, finally, look up, Logan saw the same emotions Carlos had, flash in James' eyes.

"Logan..." James breathed his voice almost inaudible. Logan could see the same look of disbelief and confusion in both James' and Carlos' face.

"I can explain." Logan said quickly, voice raising a few octaves. He started panicking and grew scared. Logan knew James and Carlos were already suspicious of him. They'd seen firsthand some of Logan's injuries, and this didn't help him in any way. Logan knew this was the last straw.

The shrill sound of the bell suddenly rang for first period. Logan knew it was a cliché, but for the time being he was 'saved by the bell.'

"Look at that!" Logan said a relieved smile on his face. "Don't want to be late to class."

With that Logan closed his locker shut, left his stunned friends, and all but ran to class. Logan could hear Carlos and James calling for him to come back and to wait for them. Logan did neither.

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><p><strong>AN: I'm not sure if I like this chapter...I'm sorry if Carlos and James seem really weird...**


	3. Chapter 3

**Chapter three! Yay! Thanks to everyone who reads and reviews! :) Disclaimer: I own nothing.**

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><p>All morning Logan thought back to the incident at his locker, he couldn't focus on anything his teachers tried to make him learn. Logan was suddenly very happy to not have any classes with his friends in the morning. He felt guilty for leaving in such a hurry and for not explaining the bruise. It seemed so out of character for him to just leave like that, but Logan knew he couldn't tell his friends the truth.<p>

Logan had been receiving texts from his friends all morning, but ignored most of them, by simply not reading them. The raven haired boy already knew what they said. His friends would be demanding an explanation, which Logan couldn't give them. Logan guessed that Carlos and James had told Kendall about what happened this morning, because he too had sent a few texts to him. One text Kendall sent stood out to the fourteen year old. It simply read _'Who?' _Eventually, Logan had to turn off his phone, he couldn't read another text.

When it was time for lunch, Logan avoided his friends at all costs. For some reason, he still couldn't bring himself to face his three best friends. So, instead of meeting the guys at their usual table, Logan hid at a table in the back of the library. He felt like a coward for hiding, but tell the truth was _not_ an option.

What if he did? What if he told them the truth? How would they react to the truth that his dad beats him? All these questions ran through Logan's head over and over again.

Logan suddenly realized why he was scared to tell them the truth. He was scared they would look at him differently. Logan knew he didn't want that. He didn't want his friends to see him broken and hurt. The thought terrified him.

To Logan it seemed like Kendall, James, and Carlos was always watching out for him. He knows they're just trying to help. They know that Logan is, sometimes, bullied so they look after him. They're always watching and making sure he stays safe from bullies, well most bullies anyways. Logan knew that was another reason he couldn't tell them the truth. His friends couldn't protect him from _this_ bully.

The scared fourteen years old knew he couldn't stay. He had to leave, for so many reasons. Logan then did something _very _out of character. He left school. In the back of Logan's mind, he knew his friends would be looking for him, and the first place they'd look would be the library. If Logan wasn't with his friends, which was almost all the time, he'd be studying in the school library. Kendall, James, and Carlos didn't call Logan the smart one for nothing.

Skipping was something Logan had always wanted to do, but never really had the nerve to go through with, until now. He found it was surprisingly easy. Before lunch ended, and before his friends could find him, Logan left. The raven haired boy simply walked out the front doors and saw the sky had turned a dull shade of grey. It was going to rain soon.

For a while Logan just walked. He didn't want to go home, but didn't have anywhere else to go either. He just couldn't be at school anymore. Logan was consumed with guilt. He'd hurt his friends again. First by leaving in such a hurry this morning and then, second by ditching them at lunch.

Logan found an empty bench in the middle of an empty sidewalk, and pulled out his phone. He turned it on for the first time since this morning, to find many more unread texts; of course all were from his worried friends.

With a slow and shaky breath, Logan began to text. He sent the same text to Kendall, James, and Carlos. It was just two simple words.

_'I'm sorry.'_

Logan closed his eyes as he sent the unusual message. He really was sorry. Logan was so sorry for so many things. He was sorry for leaving so suddenly both in the morning and during lunch. He was sorry for not responding to any of his friends texts. He was sorry for not being able to tell them the truth. Most of all he was sorry for making his friends worry about him. In that moment Logan knew in his heart he was the worst friend ever. He didn't deserve him friends.

A cool breeze rushed past the fourteen year old. Logan pulled his thin jacket closer to his now freezing body. He felt very cold, and very alone in that single moment.

Logan moved to stand up. Sitting didn't seem to be enough for the dark haired boy anymore. He felt like moving, like walking, or running. Logan resisted the urge to just bolt, to just run away from everything.

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><p><strong>AN: I'm not sure I like this chapter...Tell me what you think! :)**


	4. Chapter 4

**Here's chapter four! I'm really proud of how long this chapter is, well it's much longer than the first three! I once again, have to thank all the people of read and review this story! You guys are the _BEST!_ Disclaimer: I own nothing**

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><p>For what seemed like a long time, Logan just walked. The whole time the fourteen year old wandered the lonely and empty streets, he kept his head down, staring at the grey and cracked sidewalk he passed. It helped him clear his mind and get a firm grip on things again. Logan was beginning to realize how stupid and selfish he really was. All he'd done was hurt the people that cared about him, his best friends. They were the only people who actually gave a damn about him, and he'd hurt them. It seemed to be the theme of the day, Logan thought to himself, hurting those who cared about him. The sudden realizations just made Logan feel worse, he felt worthless and undeserving of their ever present friendship. The dark haired boy now knew he deserved all the bruises and cuts he'd gotten. It was like his punishment.<p>

Logan looked up for the first time since he started his walk. The first thing he noticed was the almost black sky and a crash of thunder boomed overhead. In no time, it was raining. Logan pulled the hood of his jacket over his head in a, failed, attempt to stay dry.

As he wandered, in the rain, Logan found himself standing in front of a park. Not just any park, but the park where he met his three best friends. Logan pressed his back against a nearby tree and looked around. The giant tree's leaves provided a safe haven from the pouring rain at the moment. For the most part, Logan's childhood playground looked exactly the same as it did eight years ago. The same swing set sat in the same place; the same monkey bars were still an odd shade of green, while the same yellow slide was still swirly. That park held so many of Logan's childhood memories, some good, some were, well, not so good. Yet, after everything he'd been through today, Logan smiled. A real smile. His favorite and most prized memory of the park ran through his head.

A six year old Logan and his family had just moved to Minnesota from Texas. Logan's mom had decided to take her son to the park for some fresh air. While playing alone at the park one cool October day, a small Logan found a bright blue ball had rolled to a stop right in front of him. The small boy picked up the toy and looked around, hoping to find its owner. When, out of nowhere a chaotic group of three boys rushed up from behind Logan and asked if he'd seen their missing blue ball. Logan didn't hesitate to return the toy. The four boys instantly clicked in that moment in the middle of the park, and a group of three quickly became four.

Though it was still raining, Logan sat down on a bench not too far from the tree, but not close enough to still be protected from the rain. The rain it seemed had only intensified and now lighting filled the dark sky. A drenched Logan didn't seem to care that he sat in the middle of a storm. In truth, most of his life felt like one long never ending storm. So, to him, it wasn't a new or weird feeling. That was saddest part, he realized as he sat there. And yet, sitting there the rain felt cleansing and almost refreshing. For whatever reason, the rain made the broken boy feel alive for the first time in a long time. It was a feeling he couldn't describe in words, he just knew it felt good. Logan was so caught up in his own mind and world that he didn't see a dark figure drawing near.

"Logan?"

The raven haired boy jumped at the startling and sudden sound. Looking back, in the direction of the voice, Logan saw an all too familiar face approaching very quickly. The short figure ran as fast as it could across the street, almost getting hit by a passing car. Logan could feel his heart pounding. In an instant he felt a ping of anxiety rise in his chest. The same feeling from this morning filled the now nervous boy, like he was going to be sick. He'd been found.

"Logan!" It was Carlos.

The short Latino came to a quick stop; he almost slipped on the wet grass. Logan could see that his friend was obviously out of breath from running.

"Do you know how long we've been looking for you?" Carlos half said half yelled as he tried to catch his breath.

Logan could tell he was upset by the way his jaw clenched, Carlos also seemed a little sad by the way his voice cracked a little toward the end as he spoke, and last Logan could see relief in his friend's dark brown eyes.

The fourteen year old sat there a little stunned. How did Carlos find him? It was the only thing Logan could think.

Without any warning, Carlos pulled out his phone and pressed a few buttons. Logan noticed he didn't even get a chance to speak. He narrowed his eyes, but waved off the thought.

"I found him!" Carlos had to shout in order to be heard over the now strong wind. Logan saw his friend turn around, as if he'd be able to hear well if his back was turned. 'We're at the park!" With that Carlos closed his phone and turned back around to face Logan. The dark haired boy could only guess which of their friends Carlos called.

"What happened?" Carlos yelled over a crash of thunder. The shorter of the two boys sighed loudly in announce when another roll of thunder filled the sky.

Logan could see how frustrated Carlos was by the current state of weather. Though he felt light headed, Logan stood up and said, "Come on!" He started walking across the street to a small seemingly empty café.

The two dripping wet boys found a lone table near the back and promptly sat down. They both avoided the looks of the other customers, who started at the two fourteen year olds. Carlos stripped off his soaked jacket and placed it on the back of his chair, while Logan pulled off his hood and ran a hand through his damp hair.

"Now, the truth Logan, what's going on?" Carlos said, his voice took on a serious tone that Logan, or anyone else for that matter, wasn't used to. It was surprising and made Logan flinch.

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><p><strong>AN: I struggled _so_ much when writing this chapter! (Which is weird because I had no trouble writing some of what happens later in the story). I'm not sure why...Maybe it's because I'm not sure about Carlos', James' and Kendall's emotions. I'm _still_ not sure how Kendall's going to react. So suggestions would be nice! :) Review and tell me what yout think.**


	5. Chapter 5

**Here's chapter 5! (I can't believe there's a chapter 5!) Thanks to all who read and especially to those who review, you guys are the best! (So I put a flashback from the end of the last chapter at the beginning...It just felt kinda weired to have it start without the flashback, but I'm not sure if it works...) Disclaimer: I own nothing**

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><p>"<em>Now, the truth Logan, what's going on?" Carlos said, his voice took on a serious tone that Logan, or anyone else for that matter, wasn't used to. It was surprising and made Logan flinch.<em>

For a short moment Logan didn't say anything. When he gathered his thoughts he said, "I think we should wait for James and Kendall." He spoke softly and looked down at the white table. He couldn't meet Carlos' dark brown eyes. Logan knew if he was going to tell his friends the truth, he'd do it with all of them there. He didn't want to explain everything multiple times, once was already too many for the fourteen year old.

The shorter of the two nodded in agreement and said nothing. Instead, Carlos pulled out his phone once again, this time though to text, probably texting Kendall or James. For a second time Logan had to guess which friend had just been notified about his being found.

There was a short period of time when, after Carlos closed his phone and put it away, the two boys sat quietly. The truth was Logan didn't know what to say. What could he say? Somewhere in the back of his mind, Logan knew that this was really weird for Carlos, and maybe even a little uncomfortable. The thought made Logan feel guilty. He didn't want his best friend to feel this way because of him.

In what seemed like no time, James arrived. As the tall boy entered the café, he shook and closed his wet purple umbrella. James ran a hand through his hair; no doubt making sure it was still dry and perfect. The injured boy grinned, only James would be concerned about his hair at a time like this.

"What's going on?" James yelled from all the way across the tiny café, not caring about anyone else who might stare. James pointed his brightly colored umbrella at Logan as he spoke. The tall boy walked over to Carlos and Logan; obviously mad he took the empty seat next to Carlos, diagonal from Logan, and narrowed his hazel eyes.

Logan watched as Carlos began to snicker and tried to hide a smile with a hand. If he wasn't filled with guilt, Logan knew he'd be laughing right along with Carlos. The fact that James had been yelling in the middle of a tiny coffee shop and had been waving a_ purple umbrella_ around had been the funniest thing Logan had seen in a long time. The thought made Logan smile, but only slightly. The bruised boy tried not to look directly at the elderly waitress who shot the three boys dirty looks from behind her place at the counter. From the corner of his eye he could see her shake her head, but he couldn't hear what she muttered under her breath. Something told him he didn't want to know.

"I'll tell you guys the truth. I promise, but only when Kendall gets here." Logan told James before the tall boy could say another word. James being James sighed dramatically, crossed his arms over his chest, and turned his head away.

Logan tapped his foot impatiently as they waited. The longer they sat there, in silence, the more the raven haired boy felt like bolting again. Of course, it would be harder this time. With Carlos and James there it'd be nearly impossible. He glanced over at his friends; Logan could only guess what they were thinking about, he felt he'd done a lot of guessing in the last hour. Logan knew, deep down, they knew what was really going on, or at the very least they had guessed. What other explanation could they have drawn? His friends definitely weren't stupid. Plus, it wasn't like Logan was being harassed by a bully at school; well he wasn't at the moment.

A strong crash of thunder shook the small café gently and was followed quickly by a flash of lightening. As he looked out the window, Logan saw nothing but rain and dark clouds.

Carlos, as discreetly as he could, which wasn't very discreet at all, kept looking at the dark bruise under Logan's eye. The look made Logan feel very self-conscious. He shifted awkwardly in his seat. James, on the other hand seemed to be avoiding looking at Logan as much as he possibly could. It was as if he didn't want to see one of his best friends hurt, like he didn't want to believe something like this was really happening. Logan looked down at his hands and began wondering if there was back door.

Logan's thoughts were interrupted as the little bell above the front door chimed, signaling the arrival of a new customer. The battered boy didn't have to look up to know who had just entered the coffee shop. The truth was so close to coming out now, it scared Logan.

His hands began to shake slightly under the table. For a second the fourteen year old closed his dark brown eyes and tried the best he could to calm himself. Logan focused on controlling his shaky breathing. He tried to tell himself that everything was going to be ok, and not to worry. Logan repeated the mantra over and over again. It didn't work.

With a deep sigh, Logan's eyes drifted up slowly to the front door. He could feel his heart pounding against his rib cage. Logan's stomach felt like it had been tied into one never ending knot.

It didn't surprise Logan that it'd been Kendall to walk through the door. It also didn't surprise him that his friend looked angry. What _did_ surprise him were Kendall's red rimmed eyes, Logan was confused and admittedly a little scared. Though they'd been best friends since they were six, Logan had only seen Kendall cry once. It was when his dad died five years ago. Other than that, Kendall wasn't one to show that kind of emotion, not to anyone. Kendall was strong, he was their unspoken leader, and he was _never_ that vulnerable. So, why was he so upset now?

Both Carlos and James saw Logan's strange reaction to something by the door. The two simultaneously turned their head back to see Kendall. Logan watched as Carlos and James looked back at each other, eyes meeting as confusion filled them.

The hurt boy realized this was the first time he'd seen Kendall all day. This was the first time he'd seen Logan's bruise. Logan looked at a clock that hung above the main counter, it read 4:45. For a brief moment Logan caught Kendall's green eyes. The look of pure hurt in his best friend's eyes made Logan look down and away, ashamed of himself for causing the hurt expression.

Unlike James, Kendall made his way over to his friends in silence. The blonde boy took the only open seat, right next to Logan. The raven haired boy kept his eyes down and his head low.

"I think it's time we talked." It was Carlos who broke the tense silence. He looked over at Logan, who'd looked up when his friend spoke, and gave him a small encouraging smile. Logan smiled back, though it didn't reach his eyes. He turned to look over at James who simply nodded, and then he looked at Kendall, who didn't say or do anything.

"I'm sorry guys." Logan spoke just above a whisper, he was almost inaudible.

"Sorry for what?" James spoke up, his expression, his eyes, confused.

"I'm sorry for everything." Logan said as it was nothing. "For this morning, for lunch, and for this bruise" Though he whispered that last part under his breath, Kendall heard.

"This isn't your fault." The tall blonde said harshly. Logan timidly looked over at his best friend to see Kendall's eyes turn hard and narrow.

Logan bit his lip at the expression Kendall wore. It was the first thing Logan had heard Kendall say all day.

"You guys don't know the whole story." Logan said quietly. He looked down once again. "It all started when we were ten."

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><p><strong>AN: I know this isn't the best chapter ever...Sorry...(It's their emotions and reactions! They're killing me!) Next chapter though, will (hopefully) be a thousand times better and will be way more more intense! Trust me when I say that...I have a few things planned for the next couple of chapters... Please review and tell me what you think! :)**


	6. Chapter 6

**Chapter six! (I honestly believed I'd never make it past the first two chapters...) Ha ha...Anyways...This chapter was originally longer, but I decided to split it in half (It was just _way_ to long.) Thank you to all who read! A very special thanks goes out to those who review, you guys give me the confidence to keep on writing this story! Disclaimer: I don't own anything**

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><p>The bruised boy found it was harder to tell his friends the truth than he'd thought. Logan honesty didn't know to expect from his three best friends, he didn't know how they'd react. Would they be angry at him, for keep this a secret for so long? Would they look at him differently? Would they still want to be friends with him, after everything they were about to hear? The questions left the fourteen year old breathless and scared.<p>

"After my mom died, my dad started drinking." Logan's voice was stranded, it cracked. Though he tried to play it off by clearing his throat, his friends saw right through him. "You know, at first I didn't get hurt too seriously, just a few hits, but he never left a bruise. Well until know."

Logan stopped for a second to take a deep breath; it came out shaky and uneven. He stared intently at his hands that sat in his lap. He didn't want to see his friend's faces; he didn't want to see their shocked, confused, and hurt expressions. In that moment, Logan felt very overwhelmed by just talking about this. He'd never told anyone before, much less spoken the words out loud.

The memories of all those times ran through Logan's mind in a flash, all the hits, cuts, bruises. All the pain, not only physical but emotional, he remembered, he'd always remember. Logan knew years from now, no matter what he'd be doing, he'd have to carry around those memories. The raven haired boy could feel his chest tighten at the thought. These memories would haunt him forever. He blinked back tears that threatened to spill over and revile his true feelings.

"The hits got harder." He gestured to the bruise on under his eye. "It got more serious, and I didn't know what to do. What could I do?" Logan meant for that last part to be rhetorical question.

"You could've told us." Carlos said gently, voice soft and non-judgmental. "We would've been there for you. We could've helped."

Logan, still not looking up, nodded slightly. He knew he should've told his friends, but he didn't, so he ended up suffering alone.

"I didn't want to bother you guys." Logan mumbled quickly, his words ran together into one word. Sadly, he knew he was being honest. He didn't want to be a burden to his friends; he didn't want them to worry. This brought him, in a way, back to the beginning of everything.

"How would that have bothered us?" James half shouted half said. Logan looked over at the elderly waitress who was shooting death glares. Logan looked back over at James to see the tall boy's eyes wide and mouth gaping.

"I don't-" Logan began but stopped to gather his thought and what he wanted to say. "I honestly don't know. I just didn't want you guys to know." He shook his head in the process of explaining. Hearing the words, actually saying them, it all seemed so stupid now. Why didn't he say anything?

"So that's it? You just didn't want us to know?" Kendall shouted his face and voice full of rage. The blonde boy ran a hand through his hair, frustrated.

"I was scared, ok?" Logan shouted right back at his friend, he looked right at Kendall. Tears blurred his vision. "I was scared." He whispered as a tear fell down his pale cheek.

That was it, he broke down. Angrily, he whipped the tear and blinked rapidly hoping to get rid of any new tears. He gave a short sigh and placed his face in his hands. He'd admitted his biggest secret. Something he'd hoped he would never have to do. More importantly, he'd admitted the biggest the truth to himself, he was scared. He was _always_ scared, scared to go home, to be in the same room as his father, to live in the same house as the man who hurt him.

"Logan. I'm sorry. I-I didn't mean-" Kendall began; trying to make amends, but was cut off.

"No. You guys are right. I should've told you guys." Logan said, he lifted up his head, and met Kendall's eyes. "I shouldn't have let it get as bad as it did. It's my fault."

"This isn't your fault, Logan." James spoke up, he sounded annoyed, like he couldn't understand why his best friend thought this was his fault. "How could this ever be your fault?"

"I should've said something. If I had, I wouldn't have this bruise." Logan pointed to the dark bruise under his eye. "Or, the bruise on my leg, I wouldn't have gotten cut, or that mark on my wrist." He looked directly at Carlos then James.

"You can't blame yourself for something you had no control over. Your dad _hit you_, Logan. That is _not_ your fault." Carlos said trying desperately to make his friend really see what he was saying. Logan looked over at James who was nodding.

"You can't go back." Kendall said suddenly. He turned his head to look at Logan. "You have to get out of there. We have to tell the police or something. You can stay with me until then."

"Kendall, that's nice and all, but you don't have-" Logan shook his head quickly as he tried to decline his friend's offer, but was cut off. He didn't want to be a burden. He'd already told them the truth about his dad, they had to live with the fact they knew the ugly truth, Loan didn't want them to also have to take care of him.

"Logan you're not going back." Kendall said, his voice unwavering. He was dead serious and Logan could see that. Kendall had that look in his eyes, fierce and determinate. Just like that, he didn't seem so vulnerable anymore. Kendall was once again their unspoken leader. The raven haired boy tried to protest again but ended up with the same results.

"You're not going back." James said looking directly at Logan; he spoke slowly, as if he was explaining something to a small child.

"Fine." Logan ran a hand through his dark hair. He knew they were right. He couldn't go back, especially not since he told his friends the truth. They could get hurt and that was the last thing Logan wanted, so he agreed with them. Only for the sake of his friends though. "I'll stay with Kendall, but I need to go home and get a few things."

"What could you possibly need?" Carlos questioned his eyes narrowed as his eye brows pulled together. The short Latino seemed skeptical of his friend.

Logan shrugged and said, "I need to get a few things, like clothes."

"Ok well, we'll go with you." Kendall said and stood up. The tall blonde pulled his hood over his head as he saw the weather was still bad. The rain was still going strong, and it hadn't changed in the last hour. The tall trees that surrounded the park across the street swayed with the strong wind.

"No, you guys don't have to go with me." Logan jumped up quickly as he saw Carlos and James stand up too. "I'll be fine. I can meet you guys back here in an hour." Logan knew it was going to be hard enough just going back. What if his dad was there? What if his friends said something about what Logan told them? It wouldn't end well.

It surprised Logan when his friends agreed with him. The bruised boy wasn't expecting that. Maybe it was because they didn't feel like arguing. Or maybe it was because the four boys felt emotionally drained. Whatever the reason, Logan didn't care. He was just happy to walk out that front door by himself.

What he didn't know was it would be the last time he'd see his friends.

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><p>Logan walked up the steps to his childhood home, a home that held so many memories. In some ways it was like the park where he met his best friends. The only difference was this place only seemed to hold bad memories, memories of pain and hurt.<p>

He opened the red front door slowly, hoping his dad wasn't home. Logan closed the door behind him quickly, his back pressed against the entry. He stood there for a short moment, listening for his dad. With closed eyes, he breathed a sigh of relief when Logan realized his dad wasn't home. The raven haired boy rushed up the stairs to his room and flung the door open. As fast as he could, Logan grabbed a duffle bag from under his bed and started filling it with clothes.

With a pounding heart, Logan looked at the clock on his nightstand. His dad would be home at any moment. He had to hurry.

As Logan pulled out the last of his clothes from his closet, he heard someone's breathing. The now terrified fourteen year old turned around to see his dad standing in the doorway, his eyes glazed over, an empty bottle in hand.

"Where do you think you're going?" Mr. Mitchell slurred, he stumbled into Logan's bedroom. The tall man dropped the glass bottle; it shattered into small and jagged pieces.

Logan never got the chance to say anything. He watched as his dad eyed the sharp pair of scissors that sat on his dark brown desk.

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><p><strong>AN: This chapter was alright at best. (I'm not used to writing so much dialogue! As you can tell from the first few chapters...) By the way, the next couple of chapters will be told from different characters POVs, for reasons, but don't worry this story started with Logan and it's going to end with Logan! I hoped you liked it! Tell me what you think! **


	7. Chapter 7

**Chapter Seven! You know, it's really weird to me that there's a chapter seven, I really thought this story was going to be a lot shorter! (Don't worry though, it's far from being over!) By the way, this will the be the first chapter that's not told from Logan's pov! (I know! I'm sad too! Don't worry though like I said last chapter, It started with Logan it's gonna end with him! You just have to trust me!) I will once again thank those who read. To those who leave reviews, you guys are the best! Thank you thank you thank you! Disclaimer: I own nothing **

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><p>James hated waiting. He was a very impatient person, and sitting there anticipating Logan finally getting back was killing the fourteen year old. The tall brown haired boy tapped his fingers rhythmically against the pale white table he and his friends sat at. James swore he'd been waiting for what felt like hours, though in reality, Logan had only been gone for twenty minutes. James knew he should be more patient, but that wasn't him. That was never him. If any of his friends had patience it was Carlos.<p>

Carlos bit his bottom lip nervously. The words played over and over again in his head. Logan's dad hits him, he hurts him. The very thought made the short Latino's eyes water. Carlos didn't want to cry in front of Logan. So, whenever Logan had been looking at him, he blinked back the tears. He wanted to be strong and there for his friend in his time of need, but now that Logan was gone, Carlos didn't want to be strong anymore. That was Kendall's job.

Kendall sighed, he was mad at himself, furious even. How could he have been so mean to Logan? He yelled at his best friend for something that wasn't even his fault. The blonde shook his head slowly. What kind of friend was he? Kendall felt horrible as he kept repeating the words over again in his head. He knew he was a bad friend. The thing was Kendall knew he said those things because he was scared. He didn't want to lose Logan.

The three boys sat in silence. The absence of noise was strange and almost too much to bare. The ticking of the clock overhead made the three boys want to scream. If Logan didn't get soon, they all knew they'd go crazy.

Carlos was starting to get worried. His eyes kept darting back to the clock. Logan had been gone for so long. What if something happened? Carlos couldn't think about that. He sighed and pulled his semi dry jacket back on. The short boy suddenly felt very cold and it wasn't because of the still wet jacket.

Kendall found the silence defining. He couldn't just sit there anymore, he had to get up, and he had to move. The blonde was thinking the same thing as Carlos, Logan had been gone for far too long. He had to make sure his friend was safe.

James was the first to speak. His voice was soft, almost a whisper. "What's happening?" It was a simple question. One that James had meant only to ask himself. He hadn't realized he spoke out loud until Carlos answered.

"I'm not sure." Carlos suppressed a groan. He hated this; he hated everything about this about this situation. He felt so helpless, like he couldn't do anything to help Logan.

A part of Carlos wished Logan had never told them the truth. The short Latino wanted nothing more than to erase the last few hours from his memory. He wanted to forget everything Logan told them. Carlos instantly regretted the thought. How could he think that? After everything that had happened to Logan, it seemed so selfish and in a way cruel to think those things. This was his best friend, he was thinking about. This was the person who was always there for him. This was the same person who comforted him after Sparky died, who helped him night after night with his homework, who never let him do all the stupid stuff he did alone. Carlos, in that moment, hated himself.

"Nothing good's happening." Kendall added. The tall blonde clenched his fists under the cover of the table. He let out a slow breath. Kendall tried to focus on his breathing. In, out, in, out. He could feel his nails dig into his palm, soon he drew blood. He didn't let up on his grip.

James stopped his moving fingers for a second. The tall brunette thought of everything Logan had said. He replayed their conversation to himself. James' head was spinning. He felt dizzy and light headed all of the sudden. James felt mad. How couldn't he have known? Why didn't he see it? James tried not to dwell on those types of questions. They all lead to the same place, to self-loathing. The tall boy tried to think of anything else but those questions. His mind wandered to the time when all four boys were in the same second grade class and decided to let the class pet run free. The happy childhood memory made James smile, but it came out as more of a grimace.

"Do you think he's ok?" Carlos knew he shouldn't have asked the question the minute he saw Kendall's expression. The short boy cringed in his seat and frowned.

"Of course he's ok. Why wouldn't he be?" Kendall all but snapped. His green eyes were wide and his mouth formed a hard straight line. Kendall felt angry, though not at Carlos. It was the question itself he was mad at. He didn't want to admit it to anyone, but he was thinking the exact same thing.

"He's been gone for so long." James murmured. The tall boy looked down at his silver watch; it'd been almost forty since Logan left. "How long does it take someone to grab clothes?" James added, still looking at the watch.

All three boys were on edge. James began tapping his fingers again, Carlos bit his nails, and Kendall found himself thinking. What would happen next, what they were about to see, would test not only their friendship, but their ability to cope.

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><p>"Ok, that's it." Kendall said and stood up. "We have to go see what's taking Logan so long." The tall blonde eyes his friends, who both nodded in agreement and stood up too.<p>

It suddenly felt weird to stand. They'd all been sitting and thinking for so long, it just felt so strange to actually get up and do something. As they stretched tried muscles, they all looked around. The café held a bad memory now. It was now the place where they found out about Logan's abuse.

Carlos pushed his hands into his pockets and shivered as he stepped outside. The rain still raged on, the lightening only seemed brighter, and the thunder sounded louder.

James opened his purple umbrella, still not wanting his perfect hair to get wet. The tall boy hated his kind of weather, not because it messed up his hair, but because when he was little he was _terrified_ of thunderstorms. James may have out grown the fear, but that didn't stop the memories. The brunette jumped at a crash of thunder.

Kendall pushed his now soaked bangs that clung to his forehead, from his green eyes. He gave a sigh as he looked over at James. A small smile crossed his lips as he rolled his eyes. '_Only James'_, Kendall thought to himself.

The three boys walked the familiar path to Logan's house. It was only a few blocks from the café. One of the advantages of living in a small town, the fact that everything and everyone was so close together. It took less than ten minutes to reach their destination.

What they all saw next would haunt them for the rest of their lives.

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><p>The sound of sirens filled the frigid air. Bright red and blue lights flashed over and over again. A few neighbors looked on from the safety of their homes, while some had ventured outside, everyone though kept their distance.<p>

James stopped dead in his tracks. He felt himself stop breathing for a moment. His throat suddenly felt very dry and tight.

Carlos' vision instantly blurred. He shook his head, this couldn't be happening. He breathing had become shallow.

Kendall felt like he couldn't breathe, like someone had just punched him in the gut. He felt like all the wind had been knocked out of him. He felt his feet move.

All three boys had moved closer to the pale blue two story house. They felt like they couldn't get there fast enough. All the while the rain poured. The sky was still dark and black. Somewhere in the middle of all the madness, James dropped his umbrella; he suddenly didn't care about his hair anymore.

Just as the boys were close enough to see Mr. Mitchell being dragged away in handcuffs, someone stopped them from going any further.

"You all shouldn't be here." It was Officer Garcia, Carlos' father. He looked over his shoulder for a moment; he seemed panicked, almost nervous. The police officer had stepped in front of the boys, not only blocking their path, but also their view. "You should all leave and go home. You can't be here." Officer Garcia spoke when the boys didn't move. Once again he looked over his shoulder. He was waiting for the moment the paramedics came through the door.

The three soaked boys shivered as a gust of wind blew over them. They still didn't move or do as they were told. They couldn't just leave. Logan was in trouble. How they knew their best friend was hurt? They just did. It wasn't something anyone could explain. Call it intuition. They didn't say anything. What does one say in this type of situation?

James was the first to see. Being the tallest in the group definitely had its advantages. In this particular instance though, James decided that being the tallest wasn't such a good thing. The brunette covered his mouth with a hand. He suddenly felt nauseas. James knew he was going to be sick. He suppressed a gag. There was so much blood.

Carlos saw next, he gasped at what he saw. He shuddered and instantly turned away. He couldn't look at such a gruesome sight anymore. To see his best friend like, it scared Carlos. Not that blood bothered the short Latino, but that fact that it was _his blood_, his best friend's blood. The short boy chocked back a sob, though he couldn't stop the tears.

Kendall was the last to see. A rush of different emotions filled the furious fourteen year old. His mouth had fallen open as he looked on. His green eyes widened. Tears were instantaneous and caused blurred vision. Before he knew it or could stop it, he was crying. Kendall Knight was sobbing.

Two things happened next, both at the exact same moment. First the rain had finally stopped. The sky was still grey, but no rain fell from dark clouds. The air was left feeling heavy, it was unbearable. The second was the yelling of one paramedic to another.

"We're losing him!"

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><p><strong>AN: I'm actually really proud of this chapter! The one hard thing about writing this chapter was, once again thier emotions! (I have no idea how actually people would react to something as horrible as what just happend, so I'm not sure I captured the right emotions.) Anway...I really hoped you all liked it! Tell me what you think! :)**


	8. Chapter 8

**Here's Chapter Eight! I hope you guys still like this story and find it interesting! Once again this chapter isn't told from Logan's pov! Maybe the next chapter, probably not, but I'm not sure. Thanks to all who read! And you if you leave a review you get a special thank you, because you're awesome and your comments make me want to keep writing! Anyway, I'll stop now so you can read! Disclaimer: I own nothing**

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><p>The moment the sky had finally cleared and the storm had passed leaving behind only wet sidewalks and damp trees, night had arrived. In the mist of the full moon, stars shined, and there was not a hint of any type of cloud in the now black sky.<p>

It had come as a surprise to Kendall, James, and Carlos. The three boys had spent the better part of their day soaked from head to toe. Now that they were dry and warm, it felt weird, like they'd grown accustom to the water being there. They were used to thunder and lightning, now it was quiet.

All three boys hated hospitals. Maybe it was the smell, the constant stench of death and something else no one could quite place, maybe it was the way people looked, for the most part everyone who passed by looked tired and hopeless, or maybe it was the fact that no one knew just what to say at hospitals.

Kendall passed back and forth, from one end of the waiting room to the other. James sat with red rimmed eyes in the corner, his eyes vacant and somewhat lifeless, while his throat felt tight. Carlos also sat, he'd brought his knees up to his chest, and he wrapped his arms around his bent legs.

The steady and constant ticking sound of a nearby hanging clock filled the tired room. For the longest time it was the only noise in the tiny room. Time, it seemed, was passing excoriatingly slow. It'd only been forty five minutes since the three boys arrived. Kendall's mom had driven them to the hospital, soon after she left to pick up Katie from a friend's house, but would be back soon.

James ran a hand through his barley damp hair. Had any of it really happened? Was Logan really hurt? No matter how many times he thought the question, the answer was always the same. Yes. Every time he looked around he was instantly reminded of, not only where he was, but what had happened.

Carlos bit his lip, to the point of drawing blood. He wanted to cry, he wanted to cry so bad. The short Latino wanted nothing more than, in that moment, to break down. He wanted to let the tears flow, and to let his emotions out. At the same time he wanted to be strong. Carlos felt the same as he did in the café. He wanted everything to be ok again, and if he cried, everything would _not_ be ok.

Kendall rubbed his heavy green eyes. The blonde suddenly felt so tired and drained. Not that he wanted to sleep, no, the feeling was emotional. He was emotionally drained and tired. His head was pounding and no matter what he did, he couldn't stop moving. Sitting wasn't an option for the fourteen year old, so he paced, back and forth. It was a rhythmic motion. Kendall's steps were slow and his feet felt heavy with each turn, but that didn't stop him.

When a half hour passed, and there was still no word on how Logan was, the boys grew more worried. They had to know how their best friend was. Was he ok? It was the only real question they wanted answered. In the back of their minds though, they all had the same unspoken question. Was Logan going to make it? The thought had crossed of their minds more than once.

Carlos didn't want to let his mind wander to that last question. It was too painful and what _if_ Logan didn't make it? What_ if_ his best friend died tonight? What would Carlos do? How would he handle that? The Latino only hugged his knees tighter and wiped away a few fallen tears on his shoulder.

James felt numb, numb and cold. He was in a weird state of denial and confusion. The tall brunette was confused by the way things had turned out. It just didn't make sense to the fourteen year old. None of what happened today made sense. The whole thing felt like one long nightmare. The thing was James couldn't wake up.

Kendall didn't know what he'd do if Logan didn't make it. How does one react to something as horrible and devastating as losing your best friend? The tall blonde shook his head slowly and let out a deep breath. He couldn't think like that. Logan was going to make it, and he would be fine. Logan had to live. Yet, somewhere deep down, he felt it was his fault.

"I can't take this anymore!" Kendall half yelled as he turned around to face James and Carlos. Frustration filled his voice as he angrily ran a hand through his messy hair. His breathing was suddenly very heavy. A few hot tears ran down his now red cheeks.

"Kendall?" It was James who spoke. The brunette had stood up and was now standing in front of his distraught friend. His eyebrows furrowed.

"I don't know what to do." Kendall admitted. He felt he was talking more to himself than to James. "It's my entire fault. If-If I had gone with him-"

James cut Kendall off before he could continue. "You can't think like that, Kendall." The taller of the two's voice dropped to an almost inaudible whisper. "We couldn't have known…"

"Still, if we were there- if I was there- Logan wouldn't be in the hospital right now. If we had fought harder to go with him, he wouldn't be in surgery at this very moment fighting for his life!" Kendall said as cried. A broken sob escaped his lips. "He might die, James!" Kendall's voice broke. "I don't know what I'll do if that happens." As Kendall spoke the words, he felt his world slowly unravel. The tall blonde felt his world fall apart, as he spoke the words. Suddenly it felt real, a little too real, for the fourteen year old. The reality of what might happen was slowly sinking in.

"We can't think like that. We have to stay positive. He's going to be fine." James tried to comfort his friend, but felt he was failing miserably. As he spoke that last sentence, it was like James was trying to tell himself Logan was going to be fine. Everything he'd said though, felt like a lie. James didn't know if Logan was going to be fine. He didn't know if his best friend was going to live.

As Carlos listened to Kendall's breakdown and James' comforting words, he couldn't help but agree with Kendall. This was his entire fault. He should have been there, he should have gone with Logan, but he didn't. It was a regret he'd always live with now. For the rest of his life, Carlos knew he'd look back and regret the things he didn't do to stop this from happening. There was nothing he could do now, nothing but sit and wait.

"I just don't understand." Kendall said as he tried to wipe away the seemingly never ending stream of tears. "I don't understand why this happened. Logan didn't do anything to deserve this."

James shook, closed his eyes for a moment before opening them again, and said, "He didn't, but sometimes bad things happened to good people. There's no explanation or reason for it. It-It just happens." With blurry vision, James wrapped his arms around himself. The tall boy let a new wave of pain and sadness hit him. Kendall was right, James realized, there was nothing Logan had done to ever deserve getting stabbed.

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><p>Mrs. Knight returned shortly after James and Kendall's conversation. The auburn haired women found the three boys sitting next to one another; a sense of dread filled the waiting room. The mother of two felt her heart break as she saw their lost and hurt expressions.<p>

"How are you boys? Do you need anything?" Mrs. Knight asked, going immediately into mom mode. She had taken the empty seat next to Kendall and placed a hand on his forearm.

The boys all mumbled "I'm fine," and "No, thanks," to her second question, none of them could really answer her first with an honest answer.

Kendall was suddenly glad his mom had shown up. It comforted him to know his mom was there for him and his friends. It meant a lot him. The blonde knew that Carlos and James wished their parents could be here too. Carlos' dad was probably still at the station while his mom was out of town visiting a sick relative. James' dad was away on business, as usual, and his mom was stuck in a very important meeting.

"How is he? Did you boys find out anything?" Mrs. Knight asked the boys. She felt she already knew the answer, but decided to ask anyway.

"They won't tell us anything, because we're not technically family." James answered in a tired voice when neither Carlos nor Kendall said anything.

"We're close enough." Carlos murmured the words to himself softly. It was true though, Kendall, James, and Carlos were the closest thing Logan had to family since him mom died.

Mrs. Knight narrowed her eyes at the nurses that refused to let her boys know how Logan was. The auburn haired women stood up and started walking. It was nearly impossible to find out anything, but Mrs. Knight had her ways.

The three boys all watched Kendall's mom. They could see the look of fear in one young nurse. The nurse looked down, still scared, and said something that the boys couldn't hear.

When Mrs. Knight came back, her face was expressionless; she was trying to hide her emotions. She stood in front of all three boys and said, "Logan's out of surgery now, but the doctors still aren't sure about his condition." It pained her to say the words.

Carlos' face dropped into his hands, James clenched his jaw, and Kendall looked up at the ceiling. They all felt so hopeless and defeated.

"He's going to be awake soon and the nurse said you could see him," Mrs. Knight said, "but only one at a time."

The three boys looked at one another, silently trying to decide who would see Logan first.

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><p><strong>AN: So, believe it or not, I actually wrote part of this chapter right after I wrote chapter three, I'm pretty sure it was chapter three, maybe it chapter four...But yeah I always knew the conversation between Kendall and James was going to happen! I'm not sure who's going to see Logan first, I can't decide! Anway, tell me what you think! :)**


	9. Chapter 9

**Here's chapter nine! I know it's super late, and I meant to upload this a lot sooner, but things kept getting in the way and I've been super busy and I'm sorry! I know you guys probably don't care that's it's late, but I do! (I guess it's a personal thing...I'm not sure...) Anway, I hope you like it! (To be honest it really is just a filler chapter, I'm stuck on who's going to see Logan first!) I do this everytime, and I'll keep doing it, but thank you to thoses who read this story, and if you've ever left a review thank you so much! It honestly means the world to me. Disclaimer: I own nothing! (Except for Dr. Oliver, I guess I own her!)**

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><p>The first thing Logan remembers is scissors. The image of the shiny silver piece of metal made the fourteen year old gasp, as his dark brown eyes opened. As if instantly, his eyes slowly started to fill with tears at the memory. All the memories, like pieces in a puzzle, were coming together to form a picture. The picture, Logan found, wasn't very pretty.<p>

His dad had come home drunk, and that's when the scissors came into play. It had all come back in a rush. The memory of intense and unbearable pain also came back. Logan lifted a slow and shaky hand over to his upper abdomen. He quickly drew back his fingers and gasped sharply as he tried to apply slight pressure. With a deep breath, that hurt the young boy noted, Logan decided to take a look at the wound he knew was there. The raven haired boy found his injury was covered in gaze, the white strips of material wrapped around the upper half of his torso a few times. Logan knew that underneath the gaze, his wound was probably covered in stitches.

His dad, Loan began to think of his dad. The fourteen year old boy held back a sob that threatened to escape. He wasn't going to cry. Crying, for some reason made everything more real, it meant it actually happened. If he cried, that would mean his dad won, and Logan wasn't about to let that happen. The fourteen year old knew that by letting the tears flow, his dad still had some form of control over him and over what happened. In other words, it meant his dad won. Logan found himself blinking back more tears and trying to keep calm. The boy though was filled with many emotions. He was angry, no furious, at his father. How could he do this? How could someone actually do this? The question only made Logan madder. The fourteen year old also found he was scared. What was going to happen to him now? He didn't have any family, both his parents were only children, and his grandparents were no longer living. Was he going to be put in a foster home? The thought of complete strangers only made Logan breath harder. The next emotion he felt was sadness. Logan felt pity for not only himself, but for his dad. He felt sadness not for the man who did this, but for the man that was lost to Logan. Before his mom died, before he started drinking, before the abuse, Logan loved his father. Now, though, all the fourteen year old felt was pity and anger toward the person his father had now become.

In the middle of everything, Logan could faintly hear the sound of an EKG machine in the background. Looking up and around for the first time, Logan saw he was in a room by himself. There were so many medical wires and machines everywhere, it was making Logan nervous. When he looked away he saw the walls were bare and white; the only form of color was a small light blue painting that hung across the room. A wide square window was to his right; the plain colored curtains were drawn, and made it impossible to tell what time of day it was. Luckily, a clock hung near the painting across from him. With wide eyes, Logan saw it was almost 11:00. Had so much time really have passed?

The sound of a nearby door opening made Logan turn his head in its direction. The opening door had the hurt boy on edge. A dark figure entered the room as the raven haired boy felt his heart quicken. With a tight grip on the white sheets under him, Logan knew he was being irrational. Of course his couldn't get him now, right?

Logan's fears were quickly put at ease as the dark figure quickly took the shape of a doctor. An older looking woman stood near the door, eyes glued down at a clip board that was most likely his medical forms and other things of that nature. The doctor turned a page over and continued reading, eyes never wandering away. When she did finally look up her face held a gentle smile. She seemed nice enough, Logan decided, basing this solely on her warm and inviting smile and pleasant expression.

"Hello, Logan. I'm Dr. Oliver." The older woman said as she took a few steps closer to the raven haired boy. Her voice was light and soft, though Logan could plainly see the look of deep concern in her dark eyes.

Now that she was closer, Logan could see his doctor better. If he had to guess, the fourteen year old would say Dr. Oliver was in her mid to late forties. Her dark brown hair held hints of grey, but it didn't exactly make her seem all that old. The grey only made her look distinguished and refined, if anything. Her dark hair was held up and out of her face by a neat bun. Logan could see her eyes were a dark green color, light specks of brown could also be seen if you looked close enough. Dr. Oliver wore a long white coat and light blue scrubs underneath.

"Hi." It was the only thing Logan could think to say. He knew he'd feel stupid if he introduced himself. She was his doctor after all, so she already knew a great deal about him, if nothing else, then his medical history and name. The short raven haired boy was surprised at the sound of his voice though; it sounded so weak and tired so unlike him.

Dr. Oliver took another look at the clip board in hand. Her dark green eyes were slightly squinted as she read over the paper work once again.

"Well it seems your wound here is healing just fine." The doctor offered another smile as she gestured to his upper abdomen with a hand. "You will have to stay here for a few days though, just until you're doing better. There was some significant tearing that we were able to repair, but I want to watch and make sure the tear doesn't reopen." Dr. Oliver's smile faded as she said that last part. Her voice had taken on a serious tone that made Logan bite his lip. "The pain is being controlled with painkillers, but that doesn't get rid of the pain entirely, it will hurt for a while."

Logan only nodded slightly to show he was paying attention to what the doctor had to say. He knew that if he spoke, his voice would revile just how terrified he really was. There was tearing? What kind of tearing and what did it mean? How serious was this exactly? The questions made Logan feel light headed and sick with concern.

"I don't want to worry you, but it's my job to tell you this, given the situation at hand." Dr. Oliver spoke softly. The doctor almost seemed uncomfortable with that last statement. She shifted uneasily as she spoke. "It's not as serious or bad as it could be. You're lucky that knife didn't hit a lung." The raven haired boy narrowed his dark eyes; it was as if she could read his mind. Logan could see her trying to smile, and put on a happy face, she was trying to make everything seem ok. It only seemed fake to the fourteen year old.

Logan only nodded again. He didn't feel like talking to his doctor, or try to ask any of the questions he had earlier. The raven haired boy wasn't trying to be rude by not speaking; he just couldn't bring himself to form words and talk. Things like that took effort and Logan wasn't prepared to put much effort or time, for that matter, into anything right then and there. Logan was only vaguely aware of the fact that Dr. Oliver didn't seem to mind his silence or take any offence by it.

Dr. Oliver once again smiled, this time it was real and natural, not forced or fake. Her face softened as she said, "It seems you have some visitors waiting to see you. Of course, as your doctor I shouldn't let them see you right now. Especially at this hour, you need to rest, but as a mom with a daughter around your age, I think you should see them, even if it is only for a little bit." Dr. Oliver moved toward the door. She turned around quickly, face completely serious, looked at Logan, and with all the sympathy she could find said, "I know this must be hard and confusing, but don't give up on yourself because of this, you have to stay strong."

Logan blinked back tears as Dr. Oliver offered one last warm smile before she left. Deep down the smart fourteen year old knew she was right; he shouldn't give up on himself, even if it was the easy way out, even if it would be so much simpler to do so, and less painful. He knew it wouldn't hurt. Giving up and giving in to the darkness that was this situation, that was his life, seemed so much easier, it was tempting to say the least.

The tearful boy wiped a fallen tear and let out a heavy breath, his abdomen throbbing in pain as he did so. The words Dr. Oliver spoke last stayed with Logan for a moment longer. Why was this so hard? Everything about this was hard and painful, it hurt and stung. This whole day had made Logan face all those hidden feelings, feelings the young boy maybe wasn't ready to face or share with anyone. It wasn't fair! None of this was fair though. What had he done to deserve this? He knew, somehow, this was his fault. All of this was his fault. If only he'd done a better job of hiding the dark bruise, if only he'd never told his three best friends the truth, if only he'd been a better person, maybe then this wouldn't have happened. If only.

Just as Logan was ready to burst into a fit of tears, a soft knock coming from the door stopped him. Not wanting to be seen crying, by no matter who was there behind the closed door, the brown eyed boy blinked rapidly and took another deep breath. A sharp shooting pain ran through his body, there was a small part of Logan that didn't even care.

The sound of a gasp hung in the hospital air as a whole new dark figure came into Logan's view.

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><p><strong>AN: I honestly have no idea who's there at the end of the chapter! (That's probably really bad...) For some odd reason, I really liked writing this chapter, I guess it's because there's a whole new character, I don't know. Oh, and who do you think should be there at the end of the chapter? Anyway, I hope you liked it and tell me what you think!**


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